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  "title": "봄160. 그래서 합일하고, 깨달아야 한다.",
  "author": "유종열",
  "volume_number": 2,
  "volume_title": "나는 봄이다 고로 존재한다",
  "local_bom_number": 160,
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  "canonical_text": "\n\n봄160.\n\n그래서 \n\n합일하고,\n(合一) \n\n깨달아야 \n한다.\n\n\n언제부터인지는 \n몰라도\n\n오랜 \n세월 \n동안\n\n생각이 \n중요해짐에 \n따라 \n\n생각에 \n의존하는 \n삶을 \n살다보니\n\n생각의 \n주인으로 \n\n생각을 \n사용하고 \n부리던 \n내가\n\n생각에게 \n쫓겨나\n\n생각에게\n끌려다니는 \n\n생각의\n노예 \n신세가 \n되고 \n말았다.\n\n일단  \n\n안의 \n나(ego)가 \n\n주권을 \n차지하고 \n\n연속적으로 \n생각을 \n일으키면\n\n구름이 \n하늘을 \n덮듯\n\n내면의\n하늘과 \n빛을 \n\n덮고 \n가리게\n되어\n\n밖의 \n나로서는 \n\n맑고 \n밝고 \n드넓은\n나를 \n\n볼래야 \n볼 \n수가 \n없게 \n되고\n\n이윽고 \n\n망각하기에 \n이르렀다.\n\n그래서 \n그대는\n\n밖으로 \n쫓겨난 \n신세, \n\n떠도는 \n신세가 \n되어 \n\n자기가\n누구인지\n모르는 \n\n얼간이가 \n되었다.\n\n그리하여\n\n온전한 \n나 \n대신\n\n나라고 \n하는 \n\n한 \n생각,\n\n이고가 \n(ego)\n\n나를 \n몰아내고 \n\n주인노릇을 \n하기에 \n이르렀다.\n\n내가 \n\n생각을 \n쓰고 \n부리는 \n대신\n\n반대로 \n\n나라고 \n하는 \n생각이\n\n나를 \n지배하는 \n꼴이 \n되어\n\n내가 \n생각의 \n노예가 \n된 \n것이다.\n\n그래서 \n중생이 \n되었다.\n\n그래서\n\n하늘 \n나라에서\n\n지상으로 \n\n귀양\n온 \n것이다.\n\n그래서 \n\n등천해야 \n하고\n\n그래서\n\n합일하고 \n깨달아야\n한다.\n\n나의 \n내면(심리)을 \n장악하고 \n있는\n\n나라고 \n하는 \n생각(ego)은\n\n반드시\n둘로 \n갈라져\n\n대립\n갈등 \n투쟁과 \n\n부패와 \n분열을 \n일삼는다.\n\n공간적으로 \n\n안의 \n나와 \n\n밖의 \n나\n\n시간적으로\n\n아까의 \n나와 \n\n지금의 \n나\n\n지금의 \n나와 \n\n이따의 \n나가\n\n상극의 \n(相剋)\n관계가 \n된다.\n\n나는 \n안에 \n있는 \n나에게 \n쫓겨나\n\n밖으로\n떠도는\n떠돌이 \n신세다.\n\n집에서 \n쫓겨나 \n타향을 \n떠도는\n신세이기에\n\n외롭고\n서럽고 \n고달프고 \n억울하다.\n\n요리\n조리, \n\n이리 \n저리\n\n모면하려고\n별짓 \n다해도\n\n허전하기는 \n마찬가지다.\n\n모면하려고\n들면 \n\n더욱 \n허전하기만 \n하다.\n\n자! \n어떻게\n하여야\n\n밖으로 \n추방당한 \n하나의 \n내가\n\n안을 \n장악하고\n있는 \n\n또 \n하나의 \n나와 \n\n합칠 \n것인가?\n\n안의 \n나를\n향해\n\n끊임없이 \n쳐들어가야 \n한다.\n\n조금의 \n틈이나 \n\n여지를 \n주는 \n날이면\n\n상대에게 \n밀리므로\n\n전진할 \n수가 \n없다.\n\n그러므로 \n몸 \n돌아봄으로 \n\n힘을 \n기른 \n다음\n\n마음(생각) \n돌아봄이 \n\n끊어지지\n않도록 \n\n밖의 \n나를 \n\n강화하여야\n한다.\n\n그리하여\n\n자나깨나\n앉으나 \n서나\n\n끊어지지 \n않을 \n정도가\n되어야\n\n밖의 \n나와 \n\n안의 \n나\n\n이전의 \n나와 \n\n지금의 \n나\n\n지금의 \n나와 \n\n이후의 \n나\n\n보는\n나와 \n\n보이는 \n나가\n\n합일이 \n되어\n\n지금\n여기에 \n존재하게 \n되는 \n\n동시에\n\n담박 \n생각에\n대한 \n주도권을\n확보하여\n\n생각의 \n주인으로 \n복귀하게 \n된다.\n\n이 \n일이\n급선무다.\n\n생각의 \n노예신세에서\n\n생각의\n주인이\n되는 \n길\n\n사람이라면 \n누구나 \n가야 \n할 \n길이다.\n\n담박\n깨달으면\n좋으련만\n\n그렇게 \n되지는 \n않는다.\n\n담박 \n깨달아도\n\n다음 \n순간 \n놓치는 \n깨달음이라면\n\n합일의 \n길을 \n반드시\n가야한다.\n\n왕도가\n따로 \n없다.\n\n끊임없이 \n줄기차게\n\n안으로\n안으로 \n파고들어가\n\n하나가 \n되어야\n\n본심의\n하늘과 \n\n본태양이\n드러난다.\n\n보이지\n않고\n\n알지 \n못했던\n내가\n\n거기 \n있는 \n것이다.\n\n막혔던 \n것이 \n트이고\n\n보이지 \n않던 \n것이 \n보이고\n\n잠들었다가\n깨어남이다.\n\n알고보면 \n항상 \n그러하다.\n\n누구나 \n그렇다.\n\n다만 \n그것을 \n깨닫지 \n못할 \n뿐이다.\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n",
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