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Any later textual change creates a new revision; document_id and canonical URL remain stable.", "canonical_text": "\n\n봄 182.\n\n후일담\n(後日談)\n\n세가지\n에피소드\n(episode)\n\n\n1.\n내 \n고향은\n\n경북\n안동군\n풍천면으로,\n\n바다가\n먼\n\n내륙 \n지방인지라\n\n사방\n십리 \n길\n되는\n\n풍산들을\n바라보면서\n\n10대의\n어린\n시절을\n보내게\n되었습니다.\n\n풍산평야도\n평야인지라\n\n산골짜기\n보다는\n훨씬\n넓어\n\n이따금씩\n들판을\n바라보기도\n하고\n\n논뚝길을\n걸어다니기도\n하였습니다.\n\n그러다가\n20대에\n김제에 \n가서\n\n호남평야를\n보니\n\n풍산평야\n보다는\n넓게\n트였지만\n\n내 \n맘\n속에\n도사리고 \n있는\n\n무한대하게\n탁 \n트인\n공간을\n보고 \n싶은\n마음을\n\n흡족시킬 \n수는\n없었습니다.\n\n공군장교\n훈련\n6개월 \n받고\n\n만4년\n근무하고\n제대한\n다음\n\n30대 \n초반\n서울에 \n있는\n모 \n방위산업체에\n입사하여\n\n매주\n등산을 \n하는\n등산회에\n가입하여\n\n높은\n산\n꼭대기에\n오르면\n\n시야가\n탁 \n터진\n공간을\n볼 \n수\n있을 \n것이라는\n\n희망을 \n품고\n\n근\n10년동안\n전국의 \n산을\n올랐으나\n\n나의 \n답답한\n속내를\n풀어주는\n\n탁 \n트인\n풍경은\n\n한번도\n보지\n못하다가\n\n2.\n30대\n중반\n처음으로\n등산에 \n나선\n\n설악산\n12선녀탕 \n계곡의\n\n12개의 \n폭포를\n\n산\n꼭대기에서\n아래로\n내려오는데\n\n등산화도\n신지\n않고\n미끄러지지\n않고\n내려오느라고\n여간\n힘들고\n고생이\n많았습니다.\n\n미끄러지지\n않으려고\n긴장하면서\n조심해\n버티는\n와중에\n\n끊임없이\n흘러내리는\n12개의 \n폭포를\n바라보며\n느꼈던 \n것은\n\n지금도\n생생하게\n기억이\n나는데\n\n적어보면\n다음과 \n같습니다.\n\n물이\n낭떠러지인\n절벽으로\n흘러\n\n폭포가 \n되어\n떨어지지\n않으면\n\n그 \n물은\n\n골짜기 \n물에\n국한이 \n되어\n\n강물이\n되지도\n\n바다물이\n될 \n수도\n없는지라\n\n햇빛을\n받아\n수증기가 \n되어\n\n승천을 \n하여\n\n구름이 \n되어\n떠돌다가\n비가\n되어\n\n하늘의 \n먼지를\n닦아주고\n\n땅을\n깨끗이 \n하여\n\n식물과\n동물과\n사람을\n살리는\n\n화강수승이라는\n(火降水昇)\n\n대자연의\n순환작용이\n(循環作用)\n불가능하니\n\n특히나\n\n사람은\n낭떠러지에\n처하면\n\n한사코\n떨어져 \n죽지\n않고\n살아날려고\n\n흐름에\n거슬러\n올라가려고\n몸부림치는 \n것이\n\n인간의\n실존적인\n모습이라는\n점을\n\n크게\n깨우치게\n되었다는\n사실로\n\n죽을\n지경에서\n굳이\n살아날려고\n버티기\n보다\n\n죽음을\n받아들이노라면\n\n오히려\n크게\n살아난다는\n사실에\n\n믿음이\n가는\n것이었습니다.\n\n내일은\n(2019년 1월 26일, 토)\n\n오피스텔에서\n창호공사가\n있으므로\n\n봄나라에서는\n \n오늘\n사무실 \n정리하고,\n\n원득, \n(圓得)\n원남, \n(圓男)\n원정과\n(圓正)\n저녁\n먹고\n\n돈화문 \n(敦化門)\n앞,\n\n대나무가\n있고\n\n사방이\n유리창으로\n트여진\n\n어느\n커피숍에서\n\n한담을\n(閑談)\n나누던 \n중\n\n갑자기\n생각이 \n나서\n\n어제\n일처럼\n기억이\n생생한\n사실을\n\n들려\n주었던\n내용입니다.\n\n3.\n이번에는\n\n인도양을\n일주일간\n크루즈를\n(cruise)\n타고\n항해하였는데\n\n들판에서도\n산꼭대기에서도\n\n답답한 \n가슴을\n풀지 \n못한\n한(限)을\n\n마지막으로\n넓고 \n넓은\n\n바다에서\n풀어볼\n\n기대와\n희망을 \n품고\n\n일주일 \n동안\n배를 \n타고\n\n매일\n조석으로\n갑판에 \n나와\n바라보았으나\n\n끝내\n바다가\n쪽박\n엎어놓은 \n것처럼\n\n작고\n둥글게\n보일\n따름이었으므로\n\n어린 \n시절부터의\n꿈은\n\n산산조각이\n났던 \n것\n입니다.\n\n그런 \n연후에\n40이 \n되어\n\n내가 \n찾아\n헤메던\n답답함을\n풀어볼\n소원을\n\n유교의\n사서삼경을\n읽어보고,\n\n불교의\n경전을\n읽어보고,\n\n도교의\n경전을\n읽어보고,\n\n기독교의\n성경을\n읽어보아도,\n\n그리고\n20세기\n인도의\n성자들의\n책을\n읽어보아도,\n\n어디에도\n\n마음의\n답답함을\n풀어볼 \n길이\n\n보이지 \n않고\n\n찾아볼  \n수\n없는지라\n\n지니고 \n있던\n\n각종의 \n종교 \n및\n명상 \n책\n\n1000여 \n권을\n\n두차례에\n걸쳐\n내다 \n버린\n다음\n\n스스로\n\n나혼자\n\n밖에서\n찾지 \n않고\n\n안에서\n찾아보기로\n\n일상생활\n가운데\n\n「몸 돌아봄」\n「마음 돌아봄」\n공부로\n\n낮동안\n깨어살게 \n되니\n\n밤에\n잠자면서도\n\n환하게\n불써놓고\n잠자는\n\n달라진\n내 \n모습을 \n발견한\n연후에\n\n내\n눈앞에\n\n테두리가\n없고\n\n낱이 \n없는\n\n무한의\n\n가이없는\n하늘이\n열린 \n것을\n\n「돌아봄」으로\n \n감각의\n눈으로\n\n견성을\n(見性)\n하니\n\n탁 \n트여\n\n답답하던\n증세가\n사라져\n\n대자유인이\n(大自由人)\n되었으니\n\n어린 \n시절의\n꿈을\n드디어\n성취하게\n된\n\n후일담을\n(後日談)\n\n글로\n써본\n\n세가지\n에피소드였습니다.\n(episode)\n\n\n\n\n\n", "canonical_text_sha256": "9c300c896831e8be200e57ebf9f51979d67aff76598386c9500c50b5500f4119", "blocks": [ { "block_id": "B0001", "citation_id": "BOM-002475-B0001", "kind": "p", "text": "", "url": "https://canon.bomnara.com/bom/002475/#B0001", "text_sha256": "e3b0c44298fc1c149afbf4c8996fb92427ae41e4649b934ca495991b7852b855" }, { "block_id": "B0002", "citation_id": "BOM-002475-B0002", "kind": "p", "text": "", "url": "https://canon.bomnara.com/bom/002475/#B0002", "text_sha256": "e3b0c44298fc1c149afbf4c8996fb92427ae41e4649b934ca495991b7852b855" }, { "block_id": "B0003", "citation_id": "BOM-002475-B0003", "kind": "p", "text": "봄 182.", "url": 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